Pulled Chowder
I feel stretched out. Pulled in too many directions. Over-extended. I don't feel like I'm able to meet all the demands/expectations of me. I know it's mostly self-imposed demands/expectations but it's still stressing me out.I feel mentally and emotionally drained by all these demands. There are days I want a little "me" time. Just to sit & vege or to do what I want instead of what everybody else wants/needs. (Sometimes I hate being a responsible adult) I'm going to blame my parents for pounding responsibility and duty into my thick skull. :-) And now that it's lodged in there I can't get it out. Or even let go a little bit. (I know I need to let go of the peanuts regarding this. It's too damn much. But that's how I feel right now.) So I'm OCD about responsibility and duty. And it's my parents fault. I wonder if I can get a pill for that... Or maybe a grant to study this...
The MCG Jazz concerts help. They give me a few hours of peace and distraction. But even at the shows I catch myself thinking about outside things. I make myself stop and focus on the present and enjoy the show. But the outside thoughts sometime get in the way and it annoys me. So instead of fully being in the present and enjoying the show, I'm thinking and stressing about things.
Labels: ChowderHead 101, Family, frustrations, Music, Parents, Rant, show
posted by ChowderHead @ 5/05/2007 09:19:00 AM
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