The velvet cage
A friend of mine used this analogy to describe the trap you get in with Corporate America.
They make it comfortable for you to stay even though you may be unhappy. All the benefits and amenities a big company can afford to give to its employees. Your job/career at the company is a cage. A velvet lined cage but a cage none the less. And the longer you stay the harder it is to leave because you are that much closer to retirement or getting that extra week of vacation or vested in your pension plan, etc…
The benefits and amenities are a factor that make it tough to leave a job once you’ve been there a while. It’s definitely something I have to consider before I make any move. Labels: Colored Parachutes, frustrations, jobs, Time to get on with my life
Hello - long time no post...
I'm still here. Sorry I haven't posted much. Some days I get home and I feel so drained it's all I can do to eat and/or make dinner. Then I'm done for the night. Work is heading in a better direction. It has a way to go but at least things are looking up.Life is heading in a better direction. I've been cranky, impatient, and bitchy towards people as of late. Fortunately for you, you haven't been around to experience it first hand. My wife has caught the brunt of it. I'm trying to be better about it but sometimes I just want to be left alone. Some me time. No conversation. No chores. No activities. Let my brain resolidify.
I've started to read the What Color is your Parachute book. It's made me think about my situation. About the good, the bad, and the ugly. The big thing is the reminders of the good aspects of my job. I've been so focused on the bad & ugly as of late I forgot about the good.
There is plenty good about my job AND the really fortunate position I'm in.
- Good paying job with benefits.
- I'm well regarded by my peers, managers, and customers.
- I usually get a fair amount of latitude regarding how I plan and execute projects.
- My manager is really good about allowing my to take time off as I need it (vacation, medical issues, etc...)
So yes. There are some pluses to my current job & position. It's not all a suckfest. I need to keep this in mind as I think about what I want to do next with my life.Labels: Colored Parachutes, frustrations, jobs
Chowderhead 101 - Restlessness
Restless, hyper, all over the place, fidgety. These have all been used to describe me. I get that way. I’m always curious. Always wondering “Why”, “Why not”, “How”, “What’s next”. I hate feeling like I’m stuck in a rut. I want to experience things. I always want new stimulus. New challenges. I want to be out in the world seeing/doing. I’m never satisfied. I feel stifled otherwise. And then I get cranky!!!
My restlessness is currently manifesting itself with my job.
All my life, I’ve been taught to focus on a good paying job with good benefits. But now I’ve become restless/dissatisfied and need/want more. I want a job I LOVE. OR at least a job I see value in other than paying the bills and keeping us alive. (I don’t need to save the world but a job that’s more meaningful/satisfying would be nice.) I’ve always known what I am currently doing isn’t what I want to do the rest of my working life. I like it mostly but I don’t LOVE it. It pays the bills and it pays well. Most days I’m happy to get up and go to work. But the past few years it’s been out of duty and responsibility as opposed to looking forward to being there doing my thing.
The disorganized, poorly thought out project I’m working on is really bringing these feelings to the surface. Most of the time I can ignore these thoughts and feelings. OR rationalize that a good paying job with benefits is more important. But my dissatisfaction has been building up for a bunch of years now and I think it's finally reached critical mass and can’t be ignored anymore.
We’re at a good point in our lives to think about these things. Financially, we’re secure enough for me to make a change. Life wise, we’re not particularly tied down to any lifestyle we need to maintain. No kids to support. No particular place we have to live. We feel secure enough in ourselves and each other that change will be OK.
We’re not wealthy so some kind of money making proposition is required. But now I need to figure out what I want to do next? So what’s next? What to do? What to do?
Step #1: Read What Color is your Parachute? And go through the exercises.Labels: ChowderHead 101, Colored Parachutes, frustrations, jobs
Hurry up aaannndddd wait
Sorry I haven't posted much recently. WORK has been a bitch and I had browser problems on the home PC. Computers. I hate them!!!You know the phrase "Hurry up and wait"? Well I did the hurry up part for this project a few months ago. Then there was the wait part. And now we're back to the hurry up part! So I've been hurrying. And hurrying. And hurrying. Like I said previously, I've been getting progressively burnt out/restless the past few years and this project isn't helping. All I know is everything happens for a reason. And maybe this is what I needed to show me it's time to move on. More about this in another post. I'm going to run some errands today. 1 of which is to pick-up that "What color is your parachute" book. Labels: Colored Parachutes, frustrations, jobs, Time to get on with my life
Weekend update
My weekend began early because I took Friday off. I needed to NOT be in the office. Thursday night we went to the Pacific Ring in Squirrel Hill. We liked it. They had sushi that was done well and reasonably priced. We also had a wild mushroom medley platter that was quite good as well. Friday I spent the day getting caught up on DVD’s that have been accumulating in the house. (Buffy the Vampire Slayer season 1, The Transporter.) I saw Ghost Rider at the theater. It was OK but I’m a comic book fan so that added. That night we took it easy and hung out.
Saturday I went grocery shopping. Sunday afternoon we hung out with my boss and her husband. HRH loved playing and all the running. All in all, a very good weekend.Labels: Weekend Update
Out of the Monkey Trap
Yes. I had a tough week at work. But even without this week I’ve been getting burned out with my job over the past couple of years. Usually it’s just a temporary funk I get into but underneath it all I know this isn’t what I want to do the rest of my life. I make a good living and we're comfortable so why rock the boat? I haven’t acted because I didn’t know what I want to do next.
I’ve ridden out the past couple of job related funks. But this time it feels different. I feel a little readier to truly think about & explore my options. Part of it is, I don’t see corporate life changing for the better. This crappy project is not a 1-time anomaly. The projects in the future will be following this mold. I see them all becoming less thought out, hurried, and poorly executed. (That kind of stuff eats at me like nobody’s business!!)
So it’s time to move on. But what to do? What to do? What’s next?
HC and I were talking about this at breakfast Saturday morning. She’s very supportive of the idea of me finding what I want to do next. What I love to do. The whole “Do what you love the money will follow” philosophy.
Maybe it’s time for me to get out of my comfort zone. Time to let go of corporate America. Get out of the Monkey trap by letting go of the peanuts and try something else.
So now the hard part is on me. To sit down and really think about what I want to do next.
Hummmm..
I like to travel. I like meeting new people. Going to new places. Gaining new experiences. New stories to tell.
Yes, I’ve always liked to travel and going places on someone else’s expense has always been a plus. (That’s part of the reason I like my current job.) Buuut I didn’t know how to translate this interest into a viable job. Aaannnd I’m not about to make any kind of move until I know what’s next.
So how about a job as a travel agent? They get to go places on someone else’s expense. You’ve got to see the places and hotels before you can recommend them. I think I’ve got some good qualifications: willing to travel, speak more than 1 language, know phrases from several languages, been to Asia, Europe, Mexico, Canada, the Caribbean. I have no idea what all I have to do to become 1 but I need to start looking.
Or how about a job that involves tasting food & wine? I think I’ve got a reasonably refined palate. I'll need to work on my writing skills but I think my passion for food & drink are a strength. Again, no idea what’s involved in getting a job doing this sort of work but research is in order.
No matter what, I’m getting restless and it may be time to stop ignoring these feelings.Labels: frustrations, Time to get on with my life
Sorry
Sorry I haven't posted anything recently. Work has been keeping me very busy. I get home and it's all I can do to either make dinner or do the chores. Either way, I've been busy and haven't been able to post.Work was a bitch this week. I encountered a Diva. Didn't like my attitude. Wanted to know if there was someone she could call about it. I almost called my boss, explained the situation, and handed the phone over to said Diva. It would have been interesting. I'm very tired of this project. Big-lots-o-hurry-up-&-wait. Lots O disorganization. Lots O "I'm not sure what I want but you've got to give it to me ASAP". Lots O I want this. No wait. I want that. No I want this. Yeah. I'm pretty sure... Hang on...No. Yeah. No.Not the way I run projects. Not the way I organize, plan, or execute them. This project has been a cluster f*ck from the get go. I need to remember I'm the hired hand. Not the brain on this 1. But I want all the projects I'm on to succeed. That's where my problem comes in. I can't compartmentalize this well enough.Anyways, later in the week I talked to someone else in that group and explained my role on this project. Her eyes got really big. She didn't realize what was happening on my side of it. She apologized for the Diva. I told her it wasn't her behaviour or words that upset me. It was the Diva's. She told me to take anything that came out of that woman's mouth with a grain of salt. Our talk helped but I still feel this project is a mess but at least I've gotten it off my chest. I'm over the incident now but I was pretty pissed for a few days. My boss knows this is a big mess. But we're committed to it. Corporate America survives in spite of itself. Labels: Diva's, frustrations
Weekend Update
We had a busy but good weekend.
Friday evening we spent getting the house cleaned up. I’m not into housework but it does need to be done on occasion. I do get a bit obessive compulsive about the kitchen. The sink, counter tops, and stove must be clean. After all, that’s where the meals are prepared. Maybe it’s my upbringing in my family’s restaurant but the kitchen always needs to be clean. A couple times a year I’ll take everything out of the refrigerator and give it a good wipe down too. Anyways, I cleaned the kitchen and vacuumed.
Saturday we ran errands: Shopping, pick up tax returns from the CPA, visit a few people. Saturday evening we went to dinner with my old boss and her husband. We introduced them to the Point Brugge Café. (We really love that place.) I finally had the mussels in the red curry sauce. They freakin’ rocked!! HC had the pasta with Bolognese sauce. She enjoyed it greatly.
Sunday we went to C’s 40th birthday party. It was good to see him and his family. It’s been 8 or 9 months since we’ve seen him. And it’s been a few years since we’ve seen his family. Afterwards, we took HRH to Hartwood Acres so he could get his run on. We got a hike in, HRH got to run and play with other dogs. We came home and I washed our grime encrusted cars. Again, I’m not big into cleaning unless it’s the kitchen or my cars. I need/want them to be clean.
Besides, the weather was wonderful so I wanted to enjoy it as much as I could. I was getting very cranky with the cold weather we’ve been having. Cabin fever HAD set in and I needed to be out. HC’s getting back to her self. It’s still going to take a bit but she’s headed in a good direction.
I’m unwinding now with a beer in hand and Sirius Internet radio playing. I’ll read a bit, have dinner and call it a night. All in all, a very good weekend. A nice balance of chores and fun. Labels: Weekend Update
Friday's Feast: One Hundred and Thirty Four
Appetizer: What is your usual bedtime? Do you like that, or would you rather it be different?Usually it's anywhere from 10:30pm - Midnight. Sometimes I wish I’d get to bed earlier because I’m dragging the following day but c’est la vie! (I get distracted and the next thing you know it’s 11:30 or midnight!)
Soup: When it comes to advice, do you give more or receive more?I think I give more, but I don’t have a problem receiving advice! But usually I’m running at the mouth.
Salad: Describe a memorable meal you've had.Le Colimacon in Paris: Mussels appetizer, Roasted Duck Breast with a mixed berry reduction for the main course. Crème Brulee for dessert. Wonderful friendly people, cute intimate atmosphere, incredible food. The duck was outta sight. I'd go back in a heartbeat!
Main Course: Name a work of fiction that affected the way you think about something.Movie: The Life of David Gale. I still think capital punishment should be legal but you need to have proof beyond a shadow of a doubt. There are some individuals that don’t play well with others and need to be removed from the pool.
Dessert: What is your favorite type of fruit juice?Freshly squeezed orange juice with pulp.Labels: Friday's Feast
Concert, Movie, Show ettiquete 101
I've been witness to some behaviour the past couple of concerts I've attended that has motivated me to write this post:- Turn off your cellphone/pager/PDA. If you need to be in contact that much, maybe you don't have time for a concert, movie, show. Maybe you are just too damn important. (I doubt it) It's simply rude, ignorant, and inconsiderate. If you DO need to have it on, set it to silent or vibrate. And when it goes off, take it outside. The rest of us who paid good money want to enjoy the show NOT hear you on the phone. Last night I saw a couple of people text messaging during the concert. Give me a break. Again, if you need to be in that constant a level of contact, you don't have time for the show. Might I suggest you stay home? No they weren't talking so it wasn't as distracting or rude as talking but still very pathetic that they couldn't enjoy the concert for what it was and needed additional activities/stimulus. I sometimes wonder if they remember what life was like without all these extra encumberances.
- No talking please. I don't mean the occasional comment or chuckle. I mean the constant conversation. If you need to talk, get up and step out of the venue. It's one thing to laugh about something on the screen or something the entertainer said. But for you to sit there and go on and on. That's plain rude, ignorant, and inconsiderate. Some of us actually want to hear what's going on.
- No eating please. It's OK at the movies or at a club. It' OK if you're discreet about it. BUT please DO NOT sit next to me and crinkle the plastic wrap on your box of goobers or whatever you're trying to contend with for 5 minutes!!!! If you don't know how to work the packaging, maybe you don't need it bad enough. Last night this moron was messing around with his box of candy for the first 5 minutes of the show. I stared at him twice. (The good long searing stare.) He was too stupid and/or clueless to get the hint. I was about to say something to him when he finally defeating the packaging. WTF?!? In this country most of us could skip a meal or 2. There's a reason we're the most obese country in the world!! It's not like he would have died if he didn't have his chocolate snack.
- Show up on time. It's rude, ignorant, and inconsiderate to interrupt the performers and audience that bothered to be there at the appointed time. The time is clearly printed on the tickets. Most vehicles have clocks in them. Use them!!! Maybe it's just in Pittsburgh that you will be admitted when you arrive late. I know for the symphony you have to wait until they're done with a movement or a piece. I know in New York they don't let you in until a break when a show has started. Here in Pittsburgh, no problem show up whenever you like. We'll open the door and let you in. 15 minutes late, 30 minutes late, not a problem.
So what are some of your pet peeves?
Labels: clueless, inconsiderate people, Rant, stupid people
Weekend update
Last weekend was a busy one.
Friday night: Yoga class. It hurt so good. It'd been a few weeks since we'd gone and I felt it!!! After class, I went over to J's to help repair a new closet organizer he'd bought. Yes, I said repair. He tried to put it together and didn't put all the right pieces in place. When he tried to take it apart, he stripped some of the screws and broke some of the particle board. Messy, messy.
In his defense, the instructions included with the Swedish assemble yourself furniture had NO words. Just pictures. So he needed to interpret which piece went where and secured with what fastener. (He's not the only 1 with problems assembling furniture from this company. A few friends have sworn NEVER to buy furniture from this company due to the difficulties they've had. I guess 1 of my gifts is being able to interpret what the pictures mean. Maybe I can get a second job as an archaeologist interpreting pictographs or petroglyphs!)
Anyways, we were able to get the closet organizer fixed. (With a little help from a rubber mallet, pliers, tie straps, glue, drill & screws.) It's not as pretty as it was brand new (or if I had all of my tools & etc.) but it stands level and upright without the aide of objects on either side propping it up.Saturday: Errands. Dinner at C and D's place. It has been a while since we've been over their place AND they'd never met HRH. It was a lot of fun. The evening slipped away like mere minutes. Good food, good company. C and D have quite a bit of land so we let HRH run free. We'd toss 1 of his favorite balls into the woods and watch him scurry about retrieving it. The little guy got a workout that's for sure!Sunday: Shopping. Nancy Wilson concert at the Benedum. What an excellent show. I've listened to her show on NPR but I'd never seen her before. She's quite the entertainer. I guess that's why she's been in the music business for 5 decades! And the Clayton-Hamilton Jazz orchestra that backed her up were top notch.Labels: Weekend Update
Lettin' it slide
I've been very lax since the July/August time frame with "What" I ate and "How" much I ate.Well it's payback time!! I went to my PCP and had some blood drawn as part of my annual check-up. The results are in and... - My Cholesterol number is up. It's 3 points above the normal range. It's not very high but it is high.
- My LDL Cholesterol is up. It's 2 points above the moderately high risk factor range. I don't have any risk factors so I've got a ways to go before I'm in danger. I shouldn't be worried but this is me were talking about so I'm worried.
- The good news is my HDL is up a few points. My Triglycerides are under control and my PSA is good.
- I've gained 7 pounds since last year.
So I've got to get back to the careful watching of what I eat and how much. I posted a bit ago about me starting up again with the what I eat, how much I eat, and exercise. I think the exercise helped trim a few pounds off and get my HDL number up.
Now to work on those pesky 7 pounds and LDL number...
Bye, bye Jo Jo's Diner.
So long Pamela's Kitchen.
Labels: Bulge, frustrations, Health
